Why I am not living my dream life

WHEN CALLING AND OBEDIENCE OUTWEIGH PERSONAL DESIRES

For me to be able to answer this question is to first tell you what my dream life is.

To live on top of a hill, away from the city, its lights, noise, and people. To be there and always reading in the shade, with a gentle breeze visiting me rhythmically as I finish book after book. Occasionally, I may only be stopped by the needs of a toddler, or an infant, or a newborn. I could even be breastfeeding with a view. But all the same, the environment is clean and cool and calm. I could even cook and bake if this were the case. (Has to be a lot of good cookies for my husband.) I’d have no problems overseeing a garden. (And if possible, a swing. Which explains the featured image.)

 

But my reality is that I live in a city. Where planes fly over my house frequently, neighbors’ footsteps are not unbeknownst to me, and friends can drop by without a warning. It is also hot and it takes expensive screening for me to enjoy air that is not even clean. I definitely hate it that mosquitos in the city are aplenty. The only thing that remains from my dream scenario in this reality is that I have my husband and toddler. I perhaps would get to the gardening, if only to shoo pests away. Now baking might be for another life because life in the city is hectic. There’s more traffic, and so time becomes significantly shorter.

 

The stark contrast between these two worlds make me think, why not leave the city? Why not pursue my dream life? My dream isn’t too hard to reach anyway, why not go for it?

 

Well, it all boils down to calling. Let me explain.

 

More often than not, calling is confused with one’s dreams, hopes, desires, even career. For some people, this is true. They somehow found themselves to be truly called to their profession or to a place where they are able to live the dream. Now others might be more like me. Dreaming of something, but called to another. Like I met a dancer who is so gifted at ballet, but dreams to be a singer. I met an exceptional painter who also would rather be a digital marketer. Both of them crying to me about wanting to be something else, but obviously called and gifted at what they don’t like to do. So I told them what I told myself years ago.

 

Life isn’t always about what you want to do. The world is full of needs, that we ought to do something that may serve it.

 

My dream is to be rural, but husband’s calling is to stay near his office, which is in the city. So I am in the city, because I am called to be his wife. My call as a believer is also to be where the people are and not where only trees and plants thrive, and obviously, these human beings with emotions and souls are in the city. Frankly, I don’t like the city but my calling is in it, so I stay in it.

 

Like I said, some people may have it both: dream and calling in one place. But I also want to speak to those who may be feeling something is amiss. Remember that dreams are not everything, but calling is crucial to your existence, as well as others. It is possible to have a dream life without being fulfilled, but it is impossible to enact a calling and not be fulfilled. 

 

I think sometimes we put too much value on dreams, without realizing they quickly become meaningless when they become sole self-service. In my observation, people who are fulfilled in living their dreams are those who have found a way to bless others through it. On the other hand, people who have lost much personal opportunities in exchange for the chance to help this world, seem to be the most satisfied and peaceful folks in the world. There is something about human beings that is wired to grow toward being missional than whimsical.

 

Praying today will be a better day for all of us as we think of where we are, and what calling God has placed on our lives. And let me encourage you this: even when His call hasn’t quite coincided with my dreams, my obedience in the end always proves that it is worth it. 

 

Have a great Wednesday!

Comment

16 Comments

  • Aimee
    February 8, 2017

    Thank you for this inspiring article. It is timely in what I am experiencing now with my job and family life.

  • Edz
    February 8, 2017

    I was so blessed to read this article. Thank you for the encouragement that “obedience in the end will always prove that it is worth it”.

  • Juvy
    February 8, 2017

    My same sentiments exactly! I would always say, had I not have a thriving relationship with God, I would’ve packed my bags and went back to province where life is pretty simple, not to mention very comfortable. But these thoughts are always challenged: am I willing to exchange the rich presence of God – mostly resulting from my dependence to Him – for something as shallow (albeit easily tempting) as comfort and easy living?

    Really, it is in the midst of difficulties/suffering/troubles that I get to taste and see God’s goodness. It is where I am called that I experience Him most, which often isn’t necessarily what I would’ve preferred.

    Thank you Rica for articulately sharing your own experience, as always, especially on a subject not readily (and widely) understood and accepted! 🙂

  • Kath
    February 8, 2017

    Very inspiring 🙂

  • Jessica Daye Bermudex
    February 9, 2017

    Thank you for this article, it gave me a good start for the day .. Thank you for sharing this may God bless you and your Family 🙂

  • pia
    February 9, 2017

    Ive always wanted to live near the beach but i am called to be a wife, a mom to my 2 kids and an employee. Sometimes i live my dream for 3 days and 2 nights every quarter with my family so that i dont go far away from what my heart desires.

  • JackyJeck
    February 9, 2017

    I had to stop in this part coz I’m already teary-eyed…

    “LIFE ISN’T ALWAYS ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT TO DO. THE WORLD IS FULL OF NEEDS, THAT WE OUGHT TO DO SOMETHING THAT MAY SERVE IT.”

    The song Ocean now plays in my mind.

    This is very timely. Thanks so much.:)

  • Mrs.M
    February 9, 2017

    This is very timely. I’m battling between my dreams and reality and I believe in this that “even when His call hasn’t quite coincided with my dreams, my obedience in the end always proves that it is worth it. ” . Thank you for these thoughts. God bless!

  • Bethel
    February 9, 2017

    Your blogs are inspiring and your life as well. God bless po.

  • Jessica
    February 9, 2017

    This is what I need right now… salamat sa inspirasyon. Gusto ko din makakuha ng books niyo.

  • Dindin
    February 10, 2017

    I still want to pursue my dreams of living in a quiet place with gardens and trees and farm animals when i get old. Thats after me and my partner retire from our daily job and kids had grown.

  • Ching
    February 13, 2017

    Hi rica, thanks for this inspiring blog, I too can relate. But I still believe that God will let us fulfill both our calling and dreams, esp if we seek Him first. After all, He is Almighty and powerful, nothing is impossible with Him.The best is yet to come for those who obey Him. God bless you and your family!

  • Lenie
    February 13, 2017

    Thank you! Just in time for my soul searching drama for myself.. on asking myself – am i really doing my purpose? is it what God wants me to do? am i serving God with what i do? is really worth it?

  • Diana
    February 23, 2017

    Hi Mrs. Bo!

    Thank you for always providing an inspirational article to read. This one gave significance in realizing why things sometimes turned in a way you didn’t want to. I myself, wondering why I can’t just go and live the life that I want to. Away from chaos, noise and people who often make me feel bad. But through prayers and this kind of beautiful thoughts,I feel that life must go on according to his plan. God bless you greatly Mrs. Bo!

  • Shelley Bangoy
    March 6, 2017

    Thank you for sharing these thoughts. You are truly inspiring. God bless you always, Ms Rica! 🙂

  • Grace Casiñero
    March 9, 2017

    Eto na nga yung latest na nabasa ko sa lahat ng post niyo na nakakaiyak for me (for now, kasi im planning to read all hehe). At present Mrs. Bo, seems like I am stranded and parang nasa crossroad. Hindi pa ako certain where this next chapter of my life will lead me. I finished the course I love pero hindi ko naman nagamit sa mga jobs na napasukan ko including my present job, mag dadalawang taon na nakalipas. I can say grateful naman ako kay Lord to where I am. But i believe in this present situation I am now, our King of Love who is also our Good Shepherd is leading us all to the path He wants us to take.
    With this post in your blog, I would like to thank God na through you, I have this clear understanding between my dreams and my calling. After all, “It is possible to have a dream life without being fulfilled, but it is impossible to enact a calling and not be fulfilled… and what matters is our obedience to Him.” 🙂

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