One Loss, Three Gains


Apr, 29 2017

We lost a baby again. For the second time we are going through miscarriage. I will spare you the details because the point of this blog is not to explain what happened, but to share lessons I’ve learned while going through this ordeal.


When I heard there was still a chance to wait for the baby to come around, I learned to ask the Lord not only for myself but also in faith. God does not have a problem about us asking for ourselves and for our desires, but this time I realized that God loves it when we ask in faith. That is, to ask knowing He can and He will if He wills. To ask, without giving up prematurely as though saying I would rather not believe He can do it. Faith is knowing He always can and He is still mighty even if we don’t get what we are asking for.


Yes, we lost, but wow, we still gained. Say that again? Yes, we still gained. In the first place, God opened my womb, there really is the sac and an embryo, and that is still something and not nothing. Instead of focusing on what we cannot have for a long time, I would rather look at how the Lord still gave, even if only for a short time. Only with the Lord is loss still a gain. A gain of life, of memories, of lessons, of an opportunity to go deeper in His Spirit and love.


In heaven, when everything is over, I will be holding and meeting not one, not two, but three children. And if God opens my womb again this year or the next or in the other years to come, then even more! Miscarriage only reminds me eternity is real and sweet and that what we have today, as happy or as sad it may be, is not everything yet. And there, I will see these amazing people I am privileged to carry in the womb and outside, along with the Author of everything, Jesus.

I am so sure you feel sad for me. Of course, I feel sad, too. But you know what? Mourning really becomes dancing with the Lord, and for ashes, He gives beauty. I am healing, I am loved, I am blessed, and while peace and pain can co-exist was the lesson I learned the first time, this second one tells me so can pain and gladness, loss and gain. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. To Him be all the glory and praise.



By Rica Peralejo

Rica is a wife, a mother, and writer whose topics range from faith to family to everyday curiosities.

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"Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom."
(Psalm 90:12, NLT)

What gain has the worker from his toil? I have seen the business that God has given to the children of man to be busy with.

Ecclesiastes 3:9

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